essie0908

Yes! I've survived two lab presentations, a presentation of another activity, a case study presentation, sort-of two article critique papers, a morning of workshops and an afternoon of minilabs!

As a reward, I'm going to take tomorrow off and have fun. Lucky me, I have a party to go to!

Too much work. There's too much. And I can't motivate myself to do more than little bits at a time. Which is better than not being able to motivate myself to do more than what was strictly necessary, as was the case in December.

But I'm still rather happy about things. Despite the fact that I have so much course work even with one less course than last term, I'm enjoying myself for the most part. I'm relatively healthy (well, as always, nothing's serious enough for me to need help) and don't mind the fact that these doctor's appointments are taking up so much of my time. I swear, all these doctors are vampires. Why else would they take so much of my blood? It's become something of a weird, personal game of mine now: How many specialists will I end up seeing? My count is up to two now, if things turn out more abnormal than they are, I'll be seeing another soon.

I have great friends everywhere (I tell ya, I'm rather blessed when it comes to people) and really, my only worry right now is whether I can get a job or not. Seriously, at times I think I'm rather too cheerful. I get silly too often these days. At least I'm not homesick and depressed, as I was at times in Korea last year, no?

Must go and write up an assignment for my psych class now. I KNEW there was a reason I never took psych in undergrad.

The first day I meet my practicum Associate Teacher, she's sick with a cold that has her sniffling, sneezing and coughing, and I nearly faint from hunger.

(What else is there to say to that?)

And so, it seems my flu(s) are done with and over. I say this because I'm back to my hyperthyroidism symptoms again. The good thing about my body? It only deals with one disease at a time. But these days, it just means there's something wrong about me every day.

Hyperthyroidism with me? I don't really have the weight loss (which I sort of find is a shame. It would have been nice if I lost a bit), or the increased appetite. Instead I get the cardiac stuff (elevated heart rate), hand tremors and anxiety. Lots of anxiety. Put it altogether and it feels like an adrenaline rush that last ALL DAY. At points I feel like screaming or crying hysterically. I actually did end up crying today (it's the first time I've cried because of the symptoms). I feel sorry for my brother. He was playfully insisting that I watch TV with him instead of doing my homework for half an hour and I burst into tears. And I can't cook either, because I'm afraid of cutting or burning myself. Concentrating was pretty hard today, too.

But hugging a cat helps. A lot. Really. Poor Nocturne...

I don't have nightmares anymore - I've never woken up scared and afraid for quite a few years now. I've had quite a few dreams where I wake up crying, but I don't feel like they're the same thing.

Last night, though, I had one of the closest things to a nightmare in years. I was back at the school I worked at for the last  year (though strangely, the building had turned into my old middle school). I was there to work for one week, while the new English teacher was getting there. It was five minutes before my first class (with the 2's, I had thought, but I had forgotten what my schedule was like in that dream) and I had NO IDEA OF WHAT I WAS TO TEACH THEM. Thankfully, I woke up before I had to get into the classroom.

... and it's wonderful. There were so many things that I missed while I was gone - some of them I hadn't even realized I HAD missed until I got back. You should have seen me grinning wildly everywhere I went.

That being said, it doesn't mean I don't miss Korea. I miss having time with my parents, I miss my best friends there. I miss the wonderful internet connections and the apples that grow in the area my school was in. They grow the most delightful apples - so light and utterly crisp but so flavourful. I miss my school, the kids, the teachers; though I don't miss teaching English. The whole teaching experience was wonderful, but I would have enjoyed it more if I were teaching, say, science.

I've finally gotten over my jet lag and 'most everything is back to normal. Including my allergies. I feel I'm allergic to my cat, but oh well. I'll stay on allergy meds (considering how many other things I'm allergic to, it's not surprising that it's taken me two years to consider my being allergic to cats - then again, it might just be my normal allergies) or sniffle and sneeze. I'm used to it now...

And so I have a month to myself. Just to laze around and well, not do much at all. Of course, I still have to get my taxes done, pay for tuition, apply for student loans and look around for jobs, but meh, I'm not doing much in the long run.

Now excuse me so I can get some water and my allergy pills...

With two weeks of teaching left, you would think I would be happier. I'm quite happy with how things are going on at school in general though. I have the rest of my classes planned (though I'm not likely to follow them, as my track record shows), and I know I'm going to miss those times when I walk down a hallway and find myself dragging the hugging bodies of 2-4 of my students. Heaven knows I'll not get THAT when I'm a high school chem/bio teacher - and it BETTER NOT happen. I'm getting along with the teachers... when I see them. The poor people are so busy these days they're out of the school on business trips more than they're at school. They're all looking the worse for wear.

But this stupid cough... and the stupid heat... Thank goodness air conditioning is in at the school - and if any of the classrooms don't have it on when I get in, turning it on is the first thing that I do. I haven't had heat rashes like this since I was a small child. But there's no relief for me at home... Only my one fan, and it isn't doing much.

And this blasted cough... I've had it for two weeks tomorrow and it's only gotten WORSE. If it still isn't any better by the time I go to the doctor's on Monday, I will be quite upset. The man gave me six different pills and a syrup to take three times a day that I've taken for 3 days and it feels like I've gotten worse. Teaching is nigh impossible right now, with me hacking into my handkerchief every few words.

I'm not at my parents' place this weekend - I'm at my own. with only two weeks until moving day, I need to get my stuff sorted out and ready to be taken away. I've accumulated quite a bit over the last year and the last week before I leave (in which I'm not teaching and will be at my parents' place) will be... busy if I want to pack everything. My mum'll not have fun - she's awesome at packing and will be frustrated watching me try to pack. She'll probably try to take over at some point.

But for now, I'll go sleep. Or at least try to.

There's only a month and a bit left now. And of course, I'm not talking about the end of the world. In a bit more than a month's time, I will be headed back to Canada.

 

( Cut, since I tend to babble )

I went to a neurologist yesterday about my back problem. The doctor was a friend of my father and so seemed somewhat patronizing but that's to be understood :P. Turns out that I likely have a bit of a spinal disc herniation. All my symptoms point to it and they also say that it's not terribly serious, so we didn't even bother with an MRI. I just have to improve my posture, get a couple back exercises done and go for physio once a week. I was also given a couple muscle relaxants to take as needed.

I had my first session with physio right after the appointment. Though before the physio itself, They hooked me up to a Vit B12-like substance which is supposed to work as a muscle relaxant and gave me a shot of analgesic. It was the first time I was fed anything through a needle for more than a few seconds and was interesting. The physio consisted of a bit of time with a heat pack to my back, pasting electrodes which vibrated quite a bit and strapping me to a chair that tried to pull my head off. All in all, everything worked quite a bit and I was feeling relatively painless.

It was my mother's birthday so we went to lunch at a seafood buffet. There was very little variety of food there, but all of it was made with very good quality ingredients and all tasted quite decent. I hadn't stuffed myself to that degree for quite a while ^^.

Took my medication after I got home and took a nap. I woke up with even less pain than after the physio and also on a high that made me feel float-y for hours. The combination of the high and the painlessness made me quite happy and I ended up plaing Diablo II with my father for a few hours. I felt quite productive ^^.

Korean medicine works well for me. Too well. I always end up like that - painless, but high as an airplane. Actually, I think I still feel a bit high from what I took yesterday - that or I'm still sleepy after 9 hours of sleep.

I'm exhausted. Despite the three or so weeks of combined vacation in the last month and half, I'm pooped. Winter camp was NOT a lark, despite the help of my wonderful co-scholars. It's one thing to teach a class of 30 students during a school year. It's another thing to teach a class of 30 students, coming from three different classes or, in my case, three different grades. The school's so small that they all know each other to some degree and they're, at the very least, friendly with each other. Of course, my problem goes beyond that since they're SO friendly and usually don't get time to chit-chat elsewhere. They now come into my class, the whole 20-30 of them (number of students per day vary DRASTICALLY. My smallest class this winter was 3 girls) yapping to each other. I'm glad they're happy, but for heaven's sake, they won't shut up. AND the kids all get into shennanigans that are worthy of children half their age. And no, I'm not exaggerating. Really, hiding behind the curtains of the auditorium? 5TH GRADERS doing that? Even up to the third grade it's somewhat understandable. But really... in less than a month now those 5th grades are in grade 6.

And now I've lost my two co-scholars. They have 6 month contracts, I have a full year one. I've completely been blessed when it comes to my school, my co-teacher, the placement of my living quarters and my co-scholars. They absolutely rock and I've had nearly no language problems with them, and they practically never use Korean with me. I'm sure my new co-scholar will be great as well, but I only have one now. The kids are going to want to murder me, since I continue to refuse to speak Korean. I'm now also refusing to "understand" Korean as well. And heck, the kids can do it now. They speak single-word sentences, but I was trying for at least that. Not to mention, they're doing a hell of a better job of understanding me as well. The words I use are familiar to them now and since there's also no one to translate for them...

I have one more day off and in about two weeks another week of break. After that, I have nothing. I lucked out when it came to national holidays and such - there are NONE from now until I'm gone. They've all fallen on Saturdays and Sundays. Really. ALL of them.

I'm still rather homesick, and I'm pretty sure it'll get worse. I've just passed the 6-month mark of my contract and time will seem to go slower and slower until I get to go home. It IS lovely getting to have time with both my parents, but I'm used to living without them now. Korea's a lovely country and there are plenty of people who are happy here. I guess I'm just one of those people, whether it be because of my time here as a middle school student or having lived in Canada for so long. Truth be told, I haven't lived in one single city as long as I have in Toronto this last time, and I've made so many more friends than I had before, anywhere else. If I were staying here for an indefinite amount of time, I don't think I'd be as homesick as I am now. It's because I KNOW I'm leaving soon that it's this bad, I believe.

And there I go complaining again. I'd better stop before I depress myself and annoy anyone who might read this. *grin*